Posted 12:20 PM by ill
Hornier than a ten peckered owl...

What the hell does that mean? Don't know but that's been me for a few weeks. I'm bursting with enough sexual repression to blow a load like a shotgun blast if I'm not careful. No wonder my wife won't sleep with me. It's out of sheer fear for her personal well-being. Oh well, that's why we have the internet. It helps people like me get laid even if there isn't a partner involved. But... does that mean I'm not having sex if a partner is not involved? Does sex only constitute the use of a partner? I mean technically you are having sex with yourself aren't you? Let’s look at this. Sex can be basically broken down in to a few things. There is the whole baby thing but that's not the kinda sex I'm talking about here (my apologies in advance to any catholic readers). I'm talking the kinda sex where you are just out to feel good for 2 maybe three minutes then find a sandwich and a place to take a nap. I mean let's be honest here, the main reason you have sex is to feel good. If not why do it. It certainly isn't about the other person. I mean who wants to have sex with some person only for the point of making them feel good. Sure that's part of it but ultimately it comes down to a "me" philosophy. Anyone that says differently is lying. Think I'm wrong? The next time a person tells you it's all about the partner say "really? What are you doing later?" no I’m kidding. Ask them this question. "So, if it is all about the other person than you don't ever have to have an orgasm or for that matter have any attention paid to you in bed in any way shape or form? So if you get your partner off you are done? So you can just stop and there's no need to go any further for you?" If they say yes then definitely find out what they are doing later.

Seriously though I kind of went off on a tangent there but it was for a point. If you pleasure yourself and get yourself off without a partner have you not just technically had sex? So maybe I'm complaining for no reason. Maybe I have been getting laid nearly every day since I was twelve... I guess technically I've had a pretty active sex life. Hmmm... I guess this whole thing is moot. I'm getting laid on a regular basis and quite frankly.... I never have any complaints.