Posted 7:50 AM by ill
So, waitaminit... you mean I am responsible for monitoring what my children do?!??!!?

Porn.

The name just sounds dirty doesn't it? Say it with me, porn.

Ewwwww... we're dirty.

A lot of people feel that way. The whole concept is considered a blight on human kind and is single handedly responsible for the moral decay and corruption of children in our society. The government should do something. The government should stop access to it on the internet and make the world a better place to raise my children in. The government should tell me what me and my children should look at because well, I just don't have the time to raise them myself. I'm a busy person. Doing busy things with other busy people and quite frankly there just aren't enough hours in the day to raise my child. So you are going to have to do it for me even if it means stepping on the rights of other people. I come first because I have children I can't be bothered to sit down with and have an uncomfortable conversation. Do it for me won't you?

Then, suddenly the government won't act.

What's that you say? Blocking porn violates free speech and in turn goes against the constitution? Well how is that fair? Did I mention I have children and I don't have the time or the inclination to raise them? I did? Oh well then you see why you have to do it for me don't you? Still no eh? Now what am I going to do?

Ok, ok, let me get this straight. There is software out there that blocks my children from looking at porn? But I have to install it and then set it up and then I have to determine what they can and can't look at... Which part of I don't have time for that did you not understand? I told you I'm a busy person. If I wasn't such a busy person, don't you think I would actually be spending quality time with my children instead being horrified that you won't do it for me?

So if you guys would please reconsider I would greatly appreciate it. To help I've made a list of what I consider pornographic and I am looking for you to stop it if you would.

1) Anything that shows any male or female genitalia. This would include sites that are "porn" in the classic sense but also any sites that may contain any information regarding AIDS, STD's, or the proper use of birth control. For goodness sakes why does my 15 year old need to know about that stuff!?!?!?

2) Anything that deals with text or writings that describe physical acts of love. This will include sites that have pornographic stories on them. Examples would be, Literotica, Project Gutenberg, and the Complete William Shakespeare Online.

3) As long as we are discussing subversive counterculture issues, please block any sites dealing with gay and lesbian user groups or information. My son is not "gay" he is just confused because he was allowed to ask questions at these sites and they filled his head with awful "gay" thoughts. I think if perhaps you could point him in the direction of the "right kind of girl" as well we would greatly appreciate it.

4) I noticed some sites devoted to biology and human anatomy. This has to stop. The last thing I need my children doing is getting online and seeing detailed drawings of the human reproductive organs and how they operate. This is just sick.

Now if you would just be so kind to block any of that information from children it would be greatly appreciated.

Although I am bothered by your stance so far on the porn issue please don't think I am just here to throw stones. I do want to offer some praise to those folks out at The Truth. Their constant badgering of smokers and the fear tactics they utilize are wonderful. I had absolutely NO idea smoking was so bad for me. Please make sure that my children have complete access to their website. I feel they need to see a group of teenagers dumping body bags into the lobby of major tobacco producer’s office buildings. It's important that their rights and free speech are protected.